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For the Weak Pretender

For the Weak Pretender

I’m a wreck.

Deep within me, there’s this desire to be perfect, and perfectly independent. I don’t want to have to rely on anyone.

Because deep down, there’s very few people I actually trust….

So… just let me take care of myself.

I mean, be my friend, yes! And hang out with me. Because I need to know that I’m loved.

Buuut… just don’t make me have to rely on you…. I know the day will inevitably come when you let me down, and that’s painful, so it’s just easier if we keep our emotional distance and I can maintain some sense of control….

But the problem is, so very often, I let my own self down.

I want to be strong, but find that I am weak.

I want to be smart, but realize I missed something when I was planning.

I want to be responsible, but then can’t find the energy to take care of myself or my home.

I want to be loved, but then isolate myself, because I’m too afraid to take the risk of finding that I’m not loved.

2 Corinthians 4:7-10 reads:

“Our bodies are made of clay, yet we have the treasure of the Good News in them. This shows that the superior power of this treasure belongs to God and doesn’t come from us. In every way we’re troubled, but we aren’t crushed by our troubles. We’re frustrated, but we don’t give up. We’re persecuted, but we’re not abandoned. We’re captured, but we’re not killed. We always carry around the death of Jesus in our bodies so that the life of Jesus is also shown in our bodies. “

This does a few things for me:

  • I am not alone in feeling weak. The apostle Paul felt it too. He felt troubled and frustrated. He was persecuted and captured. He experienced weakness and challenges on various levels.
  • My weakness is actually a reminder of God’s presence, and His surpassing power. The power of the Gospel lies within me, but my weakness reminds me that this power doesn’t come from me. It comes from God. And if the power that comes from God lives inside me, that means God lives inside me. He is helping me overcome!
  • It’s when we’re in the hardest situations, that we can see the greatest miracles! When I am at my whit’s end, I have a promise that I will see the life of Jesus Christ revealed in me. It’s challenging feeling weak, troubled, and frustrated. I hate feeling that way. But, when things get the hardest, I often feel Christ the closest. And that is a sweet, gentle blessing!

Child, don’t give up. Keep pressing onward, by the power of Christ! Remember that, in your weakness, you are strong. His power is made perfect in our weakness.

If you feel weak, it’s ok. You don’t have to pretend you’re something you are not.

When you feel weak, just talk to Jesus, and know that He doesn’t judge you. He sees you where you’re at, and He loves you all the same.

Pray something like this:

Jesus, if I were to be honest, I’d say that I’m feeling pretty weak right now. I’m not sure what to do or where to go.

But I believe that Your strength is more vast than the depths of my weakness, and You have everything I need to make it through this season.

I trust Your love for me and I choose to have faith — to believe that, even when I can’t see myself making it through this season, Your love and power are still enough to carry me through.

Thank You that, with You, I can be honest, and I don’t have to pretend I’m someone I’m not. Thank You for loving and accepting me just the way I am! For providing grace on a basis of faith, not works.

Help me love You better and trust You more completely! Help me, and carry me through this season. I trust in You!

 


 

Thanks for reading! May you find grace and encouragement for your journey!

If you liked this devotional, here are some others you might enjoy:

Grace, peace, hope,

–Michelle Louise

http://hopemire.com

Peace and Faith in God

Peace and Faith in God

Hello friends!

Thanks for joining me for another devotional time. I’m starting to really enjoy these, and I hope you are too!

Today’s reading: 2 Timothy 1:6-10

I enjoy asking myself a key question as I meditate on Scripture. It often brings a passage to life in fresh ways! So today, I look at this passage and ask myself:

What does this passage say about peace and faith in God?

Here were a few thoughts that came to mind:

v. 6 – “…fan into flames the spiritual gift God gave you…”

This calls us to trust what God has done in our lives and to follow the calling He has placed on our lives. Afterall, we won’t seek to fan our giftings into flames (grow, practice, cultivate them) if we don’t trust God who gave us those gifts. Now, sometimes we don’t know what our calling is, but other times we do. And when we do, we should trust God and start moving in that direction, preparing, praying,  and ultimately taking the leap. It’s hard to take that leap, but it’s so worth it!

v. 7 – “For God has not given us a spirit of fear and timidity, but of power, love, and self-discipline.”

This is a very commonly quoted verse. Today, I look at it and see a description of what faith can empower us to do! Faith enables us to move outside of fear. Perhaps fear still attacks us, but fear does not come from God. Perhaps we may never stop experiencing or encountering fear, but God has given us those three unique gifts to help us withstand and overcome the fear we experience. Those three gifts are: power, love, and self-discipline. Faith tells me that, even when I struggle with fear, I can still be bold, care for others, and care for myself. I can still find strength in the midst of fear, because fear doesn’t come from God. But strength does!

v. 9 – “…but because that was His plan from before the beginning of time.”

Wow, think about that! He had a plan from before the beginning of time, and He followed through with that plan. I’m lucky if I follow through with my plan from this morning! I am so thankful that God is dependable and that He follows through with His commitments. When He promises you something, you can trust it, because He will follow through with His plan. It might not look like what we think and it might not be when we want, but it will be good and perfect in His way. And I am thankful for that! What a huge relief that He is dependable!

Questions to ask yourself today:

  • Do I have a sense of what my giftings are? If so, how can I put those into practice today? If not, who can I ask (a mature person that I trust) to speak into my life about the giftings they see in me?
  • In what areas of my life have I been experiencing fear? How can I shift my perspective on God’s ability to give me power, love, and self-discipline in the midst of those situations? Where can I trust God more?
  • Where have I seen God to be dependable in my life? Where do I need greater trust in His faithfulness?
  • Who can I share this lesson with today? Who needs to hear this message?

Thanks for reading!

If you liked this devotional, here are some others you might enjoy:

Grace, peace, hope,

Michelle Louise

http://hopemire.com

What Road Rage Taught Me About Life

What Road Rage Taught Me About Life

Honestly, I have never struggled with road rage. Ever. I follow all the rules and I’m a complete saint on the road. In fact, people adore me, and Matthew West even once wrote a love song dedicated to my gorgeous driving skills!

… …. yeeeah… If you’ve ever ridden in the car with me, you know that’s not true!

I can’t count the number of times someone has cut me off in traffic and then slowed down, forcing me to hit the brakes like a mad woman! And what comes out of my mouth?

Feeling Overwhelmed“Oh, you poor thing! You must not know where you’re going!”

Of course not! Obviously, I’m gonna shout:

“IDIOT!!! What are you DOING?!?!”

Side note to reader: I’m not very godly in my car….

Have You Heard of the Fundamental Attribution Error (F.A.E.)?

It works in two parts:

1.) When someone else does something I don’t like, I tend to attribute it to his or her character and personality. She must be stupid. He clearly must be a jerk. I mean, c’mon, they are both so idiotic that I’d nominate them for admission into the Idiots’ Hall of Fame!

2.) But when I do something that others don’t like, I rationalize it. Cuz… clearly it’s not my fault! I was running late and missed my coffee, so obviously I can’t be expected to act like a normal coffee-enriched human being, right? 

Here’s another example:

Fundamental Attribution Error
A chart taken from this social psychology blog.

 

How Depression Hijacks the Fundamental Attribution Error

Depression affects us in many ways. Read more at http://hopemire.comIsn’t it ironic that, in cases of depression, the fundamental attribution error is often reversed? I may rationalize what others do, but when I make a mistake, gosh, I’m such an idiot! What was I thinking?!

My Gen. Psych. professor talked about this phenomenon in class last semester.

I found it fascinating! I had never questioned those thought processes before.

…Geez, I’m such a goober!

(F.A.E. alert there!) 

Now I have an option to identify my unhealthy thinking patterns when I’m in a low episode and try shifting them in a more positive direction.

Personal Failure and the Keys to Responding Well

First, you should check out my follow-up post on this topic, where I discuss healthy thinking patterns with respect to the attribution error. That post includes a free printable worksheet to help you process through different situations.

Now, there are many factors that affect behavior, including personality and value systems, but our external environment (what’s going on around us) also plays a significant role.

When we experience failure, we have two options:

1.) We could choose to look only at internal factors (“I messed up, so I must be a failure”) and therefore believe there is something inherently wrong with us.

2.) Or, we could look at the full context of the situation, including internal as well as external factors (“I messed up, but that’s because I didn’t have all the information I needed, or I got distracted by something”) and decide what we choose to learn from it!

I also love asking these three questions when I have experienced a failure:

  1. What did I do well?
  2. What can I improve?
  3. What will I do differently next time?

Notice that “what did I do wrong?” is not on the list!! Asking that question can reinforce unhealthy, self-deprecating thought patterns.

Learn healthy thinking patterns at www.hopemire.comFriends, let’s stop our negative thinking before it gets to the point of assuming we are worthless.

Let’s not go the route of believing there is something inherently wrong with us.

If we get on that trail, we’re driving an ice cream truck straight into a minefield, and that’s bound to  get messy!

Instead, let’s see what we can learn from that failure and how we’d approach the same situation differently in the future.  

Aaaand… when others do something that drives us batty, let’s practice some rational empathy and continue loving them, even if we’d rather give them a high-five… in the face!


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